I keep thinking I should find a therapist; every day, something new pops up.

The Cheesecake Factory logo is impressively ugly.

I like to believe that most of my best ideas arrive late, unannounced.

There’s something deeply suspicious about a day that goes exactly as planned.

Some mornings feel like a warm-up lap, necessary and unremarkable.

Somewhere along the way, dairy marketing learned that nostalgia is one hell of an ingredient.

Digital de-aging is technology’s attempt to edit time.

Hearts sound angry on a sonogram, begrudgingly keeping us alive.

I’m sorry, but golf is a hobby pretending to be a sport.

If a stomachache wakes you from a dream about a stomachache, which came first?